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The
Top 16 "Worst Breakup Excuses"
16> "Ow... I banged my head! That really hurt! Hey... who are YOU?" 15> "I'm sorry, but there just isn't room in my life right now for both you and my vibrator." 14> "I've got this disease... it's called herpigonasyphalaids. Very contagious." 13> "You're too young for me. I mean, too *old*. We're the same age? Well, that doesn't work for me, either." 12> "We're just so different, you and I. You're an extrovert, I'm an introvert. I like classical, you like heavy metal. And of course *I'm* not a physically repulsive raving psychopath." 11> "You've gone from 'sponge-worthy' to merely 'spongy.'" 10> "Dear Christine: By the time you read this I'll be a woman..." 9> "I have early-onset onanism."
8> "You're no longer the wealthy, gullible, and desperately lonely man I fell in love with." 7> "My penis, uh, fell off, and I, er, lost it... yeah -- on the subway, I think." 6> "Less filling? LESS FILLING??? I don't even know who you ARE anymore!" 5> "My dog is having puppies and I need to take a year off in order to train them to attack your picture." 4> "It's not *you*, it's me. Specifically, me would like to sleep with your sister." 3> "I had lunch at the Hunan Palace today and according to the place mat, you're a snake and I'm a mongoose." 2> "We just don't have anything in common anymore -- you're a morning person, and I want to see your severed head impaled on a steel railroad spike." and Topfive.com's Number 1 Worst Breakup Excuse... 1> "I'm holding you back from all the other lives you could be ruining." Thank you Chris White! [ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ] [Copyright 2001 by Chris White ] ~~~~~~~~~~~ A to Z Guide to the Perfect Blow Job: Fellatio Tips and Techniques That Will Leave Him Begging for More
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